Reformed SHEology

A few months ago, a visitor commented, "So your [sic] telling me that you don't believe women should have rights? That we should just stay at home, bare [sic] children and have no options and let the man do the job even if he is a lousy breadwinner?" At first, I wanted to give the blog itself a chance to respond, hoping that the reader would find the answer to her question throughout the rest of the site, but then I realized I have no way of knowing if she ever found the answer she was looking for, so I am going to formally respond to it here.
There are two ways I can answer the question as to whether or not women should have rights: Yes and No. Let's look at "no" first.

NO, WOMEN SHOULD NOT HAVE RIGHTS
I know we have some very astute readers who will point out to me a valid reason that women should not have rights, and so I know I cannot answer the visitor's question without first addressing that perspective here.

Our insightful readers will naturally point out that the Bible says: "The earth is the Lord's, and all it contains, the world, and all who dwell in it." (Psalm 24:1) Therefore, women should not have rights because no one, Christian or non-Christian, has any rights to begin with! (If women had rights and men didn't, that wouldn't be fair, would it?) Our money, our possessions, our talents, even the very air we breathe does not belong to us. It is borrowed and belongs to Someone else. Technically, women should not have rights (nor should men) because everything we see, hear, touch, taste, and smell belongs to God. (Psalm 24:1 states that our very selves are God's possessions.) If we have anything, including our "rights," it is for one reason and one reason alone: He has graciously chosen to give that to us.

The Bible further states that when a person becomes a Christian, that person willingly gives up all those things they perceive to be their "rights". We become slaves to Christ. We do what our Master tells us to do. Fortunately in our case, we serve a perfect Master, who will never steer us down the wrong path. We can trust Him with whatever instructions He gives. That being said, I can now move on to the response that I'm sure our visitor was looking for.

YES, WOMEN SHOULD HAVE RIGHTS
Throughout this site from time to time, we have featured some articles marking our feelings regarding the ideology known as "feminism." Generally speaking, we at Reformed SHEology do not adhere to feminist values, and at times have openly criticized feminist ideology on this blog. Why? Because it can be argued that "feminism," while intended to combat the effects of sexism, basically promotes sexist ideas in reverse. I would never doubt or question some of the wonderful achievements brought about by the American Feminist Movement, or claim that these victories were anything less than good (such as the right to vote and the campaign for equal pay). But other than this, much of what we see from feminist mentality is an effort to divide men and women further, rather than bring them closer together. Feminism's intent is to win victories for women, but the main "achievement" of feminism is often to fight wars against men. It is now acceptable to ridicule, insult, and berate men, even to the point of denying them the very things that define their masculinity. Feminism rarely objects to this phenomenon, and many who consider themselves feminists heartily approve of this type of behavior as an expression of feminism itself.

God has created women for a very noble purpose: to help men. Being a man is tough. Women can openly show emotion and talk about their feelings with just about anybody. But society in general does not allow men this same luxury. The average man will tell you there his only one person with whom he feels safe enough to open up, and that's his woman. For this reason, God tells women to submit to men. It is not a command to be subservient, nor is this command equal with the term oppression. Women are commanded by God to respect and submit to men because this is how men feel loved. If you want to show a man you love him, you cannot love him the way a woman wants to be loved. You have to love him according to the way a man wants to be loved. Submission, therefore is an act of the will. You choose to submit. No man can force you to do it!

Women are commanded to submit to men. We hate this because we mistakenly think that this is a one-sided effort. But upon closer inspection, we see that men are commanded to love women. In my experience, men do a pretty good job of loving us. How about it, ladies? Do we need to be reminded of how they faithfully put up with our bad attitudes in spite of our ridiculous attempts at rationalizing our behavior? Simply say the letters "PMS" to a man and he will instantly back off. He will not defend himself against our rude, angry, unjustified cruelties toward him. He will just endure it. This is his way of loving us unconditionally, even when we don't deserve it. He does this every month for us, no? Yet we continually ask, "So you're telling me we should let the man do the job, even if he's a lousy breadwinner?" The answer is, "Only if you love him." If you don't love your man, go ahead and tell him how disappointed you are in him. Go ahead and take matters into your own hands, letting him know just how much of a failure you think he is. Feel free to respect him only when he deserves it. Just don't expect him to treat you with kindness the next time you are undeserving.

Scripture clearly commands both men and women to treat one another with kindness. Should women have "rights"? Of course! The Bible addresses this issue with men and commands them to treat us with love. Do men always treat us with love? Absolutely not. But this is no reason to launch a full-blown war against them. It is also no reason to punish every man for the crimes of one. That being said, it can be argued that there is no need for feminism at all. Why? The Bible makes such ideology unnecessary. A clear, thorough reading of the Bible will reveal that God does not hate women, nor does He consider them to be second class-citizens. He cares very much about how men treat us. (Consider 1 Peter 3:7, which states that if a man is unkind to his wife, God will ignore his prayers!) Instead, the Bible has made provision for the respect and proper treatment of women, declaring them equal in value to men (just different in role and function) as co-heirs of the Kingdom. No man-made (or woman-made) ideology is going to improve upon what the Creator has designed.

One of the most common complaints I hear in the church today are those complaints against the local body in which we have been called. I began to touch on this a few months back with my thoughts in "Are You Fed Up With Your Church?" People always seem to have some complaint with their local body of worship, and threaten to leave if it doesn't suit their fancy. "There's no evangelism team here, so I'm leaving." "The worship style is not to my liking, and so I'm looking for another church." "I don't agree with the particular view that the elders have taken on the end times, so this will be my last Sunday at this fellowship." Of course, all of the people in these examples never claim that these are the sole reasons they are leaving their church. Instead, they give another reason for leaving -- one that I find entirely plausible. The number one reason that I personally have encountered as to why people leave their churches is this: "I am just not being fed here."

This reminds me of a passage in 2 Thessalonians 3:7-13. In the ESV, it reads as follows:

For you yourselves know how you ought to imitate us, because we were not idle when we were with you, nor did we eat anyone's bread without paying for it, but with toil and labor we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you. It was not because we do not have that right, but to give you in ourselves an example to imitate. For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat. For we hear that some among you walk in idleness, not busy at work, but busybodies. Now such persons we command and encourage in the Lord Jesus Christ to do their work quietly and to earn their own living. As for you, brothers, do not grow weary in doing good.

Normally, we encounter this scripture in a purely physical sense. We don't encourage slothfulness, and the church naturally will not be found giving a handout to those who refuse to get a job, take up their God-given responsibilities to those around them, and give back to the church. But what if this scripture was viewed in a more spiritual sense? What if there is a link between Christian service and spiritual nourishment? I think this idea is very interesting in light of 2 Thessalonians 3:10, "For even when we were with you, we would give you this command: If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat." Perhaps the reason we feel we are not being "fed" in our churches, is because we are unwilling to work!

Ask yourself this question: what is my level of service in my current church? Am I someone who comes to church on Sunday, takes what I can get from it, and then leaves? If so, perhaps you do not feel fed because God has decided to withhold your plate until you are willing to do some work.

Perhaps you are someone who is thinking, "I am more than willing to work, but the problem is there is no place for me to serve here." In other words, there is some "pet" ministry you have a desire for, but it isn't available at your local church for one reason or another. If so, you need to be sensitive towards God's desire, as it might be different from your own.

For example, I once knew a girl who complained for several months that she was sick and tired of her church because the elders would not allow her to be a worship leader. This girl came across as extremely bitter, and eventually left her church with a very bad attitude. Several people tried to counsel her on her decision to leave the church, but she insisted that she had to go because she wasn't being "fed," and the church was "obstructing her spiritual growth." As far as I could see, the church was not, as she claimed, standing in the way of her joy, because there were three valid reasons why she couldn't be a worship leader:

1. The position she wanted was already held by someone else. If the need is being met in that area, then another person is not going to be called to serve in that area. It was wrong of this girl to demand that she be placed in a role that was already filled, when other positions of service within the church remained empty for years.

2. The position she wanted was not Biblical. The Bible is clear that a woman is not to usurp authority over a man. This usually eliminates women as being qualified for positions of leadership within the church. This girl was offered an opportunity to serve on the worship team, but that wasn't good enough. She wanted to be a worship leader. She wanted to be the person in charge of worship at that church, and the idea of serving in any other capacity was not an option for her. Therefore, she concluded she was not being fed. In actuality, she was being offered food to eat. It just wasn't good enough for her.

3. The position she wanted required skills she did not possess. When this sister first told me she wanted to be a worship leader, I was surprised, because I never witnessed her musical talent in public. Wondering why she was keeping it hidden, I asked, "How come you're not in the choir?" She replied, "Because I don't sing." I then asked, "Oh, so do you play a musical instrument?" She flatly stated, "No." Puzzled, I asked her how she concluded that she was called to be a worship leader when she did not sing or play a musical instrument. She simply said, "Because that is the desire of my heart."

As we can see from the above example, the sister in this story claimed she was not being fed, and she was right. She was not being fed because she refused to eat the food that was given to her. I wonder how many opportunities for service were missed because she insisted on getting her spiritual satisfaction from places she was not necessarily called to be.

Are there ministries that you feel are "lacking" in your church? Perhaps you are right. Perhaps those ministries aren't there. Perhaps you've talked to your pastor about having these ministries started, and he said no. So you're not being fed by your favorite foods, then ask yourself, "What else can I eat?" If we only look around us, we will see a feast of opportunities where we can serve, and feel completely satisfied.

My grandmother died on February 15, 2011. She was 91 years old. Our family had been preparing for this day since July 2010, when she first fell ill, and it was around that time I began to reflect upon her life. I thought about specific memories I have of her from my childhood. I also thought about little things I'd categorize as "Grandma Trivia." (For instance, she worked for many years as a seamstress in a factory.) But it wasn't until the actual funeral that I began to dwell on the manner in which my grandmother expressed her femininity, especially since she played the role of a single mom for 60 years.

My grandfather left the family when my dad was three years old (1951). We always had contact with him, and he had a presence in our lives until his death in 2001, but he did not really have any type of real commitment to the family that required any responsibility. It was my grandmother who worked, raised three boys, cooked for her family and cleaned the home all by herself. She didn't need a man's help. She didn't need a man at all!

My grandmother worked hard, but she also played hard. I remember around 1982 or 1983, she took a trip to Switzerland by herself. She belonged to several clubs, had tons of friends, played bingo, and went to senior citizen dances. She lived by herself. As I began to review her life as a single woman, I began to think that maybe the single life really is pretty amazing. When I considered the fact that my Grandmother was single for most of her life, I began to strategize how I could do the same: "Do I really need a man? Grandma didn't. And as a Christian, I know that I already have everything I need. So I suppose I don't need a man. I don't need a man to be happy, I don't need a man to survive, and I don't need a man to define my femininity. I'm single, and I'm doing all right!"

My cousin Joe, a Christian, delivered a very brief speech at the funeral home. With tears in his eyes, he said, "When my mom died, Grandma did everything for us. EVERYTHING." It was true. Joe's mother passed away when he was only 16, and there was Grandma who stepped right in and became a surrogate mother to him and his siblings. She remained in that role for 15 years, again, without a husband. She honestly and truly did not need a man!

But as Joe continued his speech, something became very clear to me. As I listened to him talk about how Grandma cooked, cleaned, did the laundry, and basically kept that house together after his mother died, it was evident that Grandma did not need Joe, but Joe needed her.

More than ever, I realized the importance in of women in the lives of men. The Bible tells us that we were created for them! As a single woman, it can be easy to forget that, not only because we are so independent, but because this is what we often tell ourselves when we are trying to remain content with our singleness. In many cases, we're right. Technically, we don't need a man. In Christ, we have all we need. But as Christians, we should be equally aware of others' needs, not just our own.

Here's a thought to encourage you. 1 Peter 3:7 describes women as "the weaker sex." Many times, passages like this are misunderstood to mean that men are somehow superior to women, but let me challenge that idea with this question: what do you think this says about men, considering that women were created to be their helpers? Think of the incredible honor it is, knowing that someone "stronger" than you is actually depending upon you for help!

Strong people are not necessarily independent, but interdependent. Strong people are not strong because they can do everything alone. Strong people are strong because others lean on them for help. This is the privilege that women have as helpers to men. Consider Jesus, the strongest Person of all, who did not remain independent of humanity, but carried the weight of the world's sin on His shoulders. Now that's real strength!

Married or single, when was the last time you said to yourself, "I don't need a man"? What was the situation? What was the condition of your heart? I ask this not to imply that your attitude was poor. Perhaps you're right. Perhaps you don't need a man after all . . . but maybe, just maybe, there is a man out there who desperately needs you.

I recently adopted two cats from my local animal shelter. One was a rambunctious little kitten, the other was a two-year-old female Torbie for which I did not have a name at first. “No Name” was undeniably sweet, docile, and responsive to human attention. She also had a sadness in her eyes, as though she wanted desperately to be loved, but knew that she was unwanted. I don’t know exactly what it was about her, but I was drawn to her, and so I completed the paper work for adoption on January 1, 2011 – New Year’s Day.

On January 4, I took my new cats home. I had to isolate them both from my existing cat, just to ensure that they were healthy, and so that my existing cat would not be overwhelmed by his new roommates. “No Name” was staying in my bathroom. She was coughing and sneezing, so I took her to the vet the next day, and began treating her with antibiotics for the cold. Over the next several days, I began to bond with this animal as I cared for her. She allowed me to do anything – clean her ears, clean her eyes, administer medication – she especially loved to be wiped down with baby wipes (I did not want to give her a bath just yet). She never scratched, bit, or fought me. It was like she knew I loved her, and she trusted me.

I noticed this cat had large paws, and that she most likely was going to grow bigger. I spent that entire first week on the internet, trying to determine if she was at least part Norwegian Forest Cat. In a nutshell, she reminded me of a teddy bear. So I finally settled on a name for her: Corduroy.

Corduroy was a book I owned as a child. First published in 1968, the story follows a little teddy bear named Corduroy who sits amongst the other toys in a department store, hoping that someone will buy him and take him home. One day, a girl named Lisa sees Corduroy, and tells her mother she really wants the bear. Lisa’s mother tells her that they’ve already spent too much money, and besides, the bear is missing a button.

That night, Corduroy searches the entire department store, trying to find a button so he can fix his defect. He does find a button, but he is returned to the shelf before he can do anything about it. The next day, when the department store opens, Lisa returns to buy the bear with her own money, and Corduroy gets to go home, even though he still is missing a button.

As an adult, I am struck by the profound similarity between this simple children’s story and the gospel.As a child, and I remember being overcome with emotion when Corduroy was finally taken home. But as an adult, I am struck by the profound similarity between this simple children’s story and the gospel. Here is a teddy bear who is not perfect, and in order to increase his chances of being loved, he tries to “fix himself”, and he fails. In an unlikely twist, a little girl spends all she has in order to purchase the bear, brings him home, and sews a new button on for him, making him like new again. The story doesn’t tell us why Lisa chooses this bear. We never know why. She just elects to take him home, even in his imperfect condition. The story continues to have such a profound impact upon me, even as an adult. It was only natural I name my new cat after the bear in this story.

On January 9, Corduroy showed marked improvement. She was no longer sneezing and coughing, and she was anxious to get out of the bathroom for a change, so I took her outside and sat with her on my screened-in lanai. There we were, just the two of us: creature and caretaker, delighting in each other’s company. For two hours, Corduroy sat in my lap and purred, occasionally looking up into my eyes as if to say, “Thank you!” It was magnificent. I imagined it would only be a few more days before I could allow her to freely roam the house and see her stretched out on my living room furniture in all her feline glory.

But Corduroy's improvement was short lived. On the evening of January 11, her eyes were weighed down by mucous and her breathing became quite labored. I took her to the vet the following day and had her x-rayed. Her cold was gone, but her lungs were nearly filled with fluid, and she had a few nodules on her lungs as well. The x-ray also showed that she had a BB lodged in her back. “I don’t know if this cat is going to live,” the vet told me, but she gave Corduroy an injection to help open up her airways, and sent me home with even more aggressive antibiotics. Within five hours, Corduroy took a turn for the worse. She began to panic as she realized she could no longer breathe. I acted quickly, and headed for the overnight emergency clinic to have her euthanized, but I was too late. Corduroy died on January 12, 2011, only 8 days after I brought her into her new home. I bawled, listening to her cries as she struggled for oxygen, and the final gurgling sound she made as she drowned right there in my car.

As a former existentialist, I tend to focus on what I've lost. But as a Christian, I can easily take these thoughts captive to Christ, and rejoice in what I have, knowing it will all someday be taken from me. The old Jen would have focused on how terribly Corduroy suffered. The new Jen rejoices, knowing that for 8 glorious days, I was able to provide this animal with the one thing she probably wanted more than anything in the world: compassion. Corduroy died a terrible, frightening death, but she died knowing that she had been chosen. And for those 8 days she lived, she taught me a great deal about the gospel.

I highly recommend the book Corduroy, by Don Freeman, and believe it will be an important addition to your child’s library. If you are unfamiliar with the story, you can have it read to you here:

Today's topic weighs heavily on my heart. In fact it is a continuation of my last post simply titled "Fallow Ground". In that article I touched on how trials can lead to loss of expectations, cause us to slow our pace, and when we have been hurt there's a tendency to withdraw. As it so happened I was talking to a dear sister about this very issue which she also had been recently going through. It was a timely conversation and much needed time of fellowship. I have decided to share here what the Lord has shown me in order to bring help to those who are also experiencing any of the issues we have raised.

It is discouragement which can also lead to hope deferred which "makes the heart sick", Proverbs 13:12.We don't have to go through some major trial to become discouraged. As I touched on before just our being weary of doing good can cause discouragement. It is discouragement which can also lead to hope deferred which "makes the heart sick", Proverbs 13:12. There are times where we perhaps do need to withdraw a little from activities and maybe even some friends to spend time waiting on the Lord. Retreats are ideal for this but for those to whom it is impossible to spend time at a retreat, a quiet room at home will do, as will walks in a park or countryside, anywhere that gives a degree of privacy to commune with God. Physical withdrawal alone is not the answer, for our refuge is not in a place but a person. We must also keep in mind the scripture where we are commanded:

And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works,not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together.” Hebrews 10:24-25

Withdrawal should never mean withdrawing from God. It is in these trying circumstances where we ought to in fact draw closer in communion with God and wait on Him.

"But those who wait on the LORD
Shall renew their strength;
They shall mount up with wings like eagles,
They shall run and not be weary,
They shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

As the above text shows our strength is then renewed so we are enabled to not only run and not be weary but even have the strength to get up! We can become so tired and weary that we cannot even muster the strength to move. Ground becomes fallow when in these situations we lose heart and become lax in seeking God. It is crucially important in these times to press into God even when we feel in life we can no longer run and press onwards. There may be seasons in a saint's life where she has been confined to the sick bed. These can be places of great spiritual blessing in communion with God. Two saints who come to mind are Jesse Penn Lewis and Amy Carmichael. Both drew their strength from God and went on to write about the deep things of God. You could tell through their writings they had been with Jesus!

Scripture also tells us that in the heat of the battle God hides us. In 1 Kings 17 the word of the Lord came to Elijah saying:

“Get away from here and turn eastward, and hide by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan. And it will be that you shall drink from the brook, and I have commanded the ravens to feed you there.” Verses 3-4

There Elijah was provided for and when the brook dried up, his source for water, the Lord, moved him on to a widow who would provide for him. Only the provision was not going to come from the widow but from God! The widow said to Elijah:

“As the LORD your God lives, I do not have bread, only a handful of flour in a bin, and a little oil in a jar; and see, I am gathering a couple of sticks that I may go in and prepare it for myself and my son, that we may eat it, and die.” Verse 12.

In Psalm 31 David seeks his refuge only in God. Not only is David's refuge in God alone but his trust also:

"IN YOU, O Lord, do I put my trust and seek refuge" Verse 1

In verse 20 he says:

"In the secret place of Your presence You hide them from the plots of men; You keep them secretly in Your pavilion from the strife of tongues.

What a verse of encouragement to those who are being persecuted. Who are the victims of not only their faith but jealousy, misunderstanding and false accusations. The rest of that Psalm is so encouraging I must go on to quote the rest:

"21 Blessed be the Lord! For He has shown me His marvelous loving favor when I was beset as in a besieged city.
22 As for me, I said in my haste and alarm, I am cut off from before Your eyes. But You heard the voice of my supplications when I cried to You for aid.
23 O love the Lord, all you His saints! The Lord preserves the faithful, and plentifully pays back him who deals haughtily.
24 Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for and hope for and expect the Lord!

The worst pain comes not from those who are our enemies but brothers and sisters in the Lord. As David says in Psalm 55:

12 "For it is not an enemy who reproaches me;
Then I could bear it.
Nor is it one who hates me who has exalted himself against me;
Then I could hide from him.
13 But it was you, a man my equal,
My companion and my acquaintance.
14 We took sweet counsel together,
And walked to the house of God in the throng."

We cannot hide from them but we can seek our refuge in God, drawing strength from Him and the grace to move on. In a previous post I touched on Psalm 84 on the valley of Baca, meaning "weeping". David being chased by his enemy (the enemy being not a heathen but one of God's annointed!), was in hiding so could not join the other worshipers in pilgrimage to worship God. Instead David watched them from the valley of Baca and in His despair penned Psalm 84. Yet look at Gods bountiful provision in this valley!
If you are in pain, discouraged and/or weary as I have also been, let us today find our refuge and provision in God. May He alone be our hiding place.

”Sow for yourselves according to righteousness (uprightness and right standing with God); reap according to mercy and loving-kindness. Break up your uncultivated ground, for it is time to seek the Lord, to inquire for and of Him, and to require His favor, till He comes and teaches you righteousness and rains His righteous gift of salvation upon you.”Hosea 10:12

The coming in of this new year I did not really celebrate. It was nice to be with family watching the fireworks and Chinese lanterns in the distance. But I set no resolutions, no new reading plan or had any sense of expectation. 2011 felt to me like just another year. Actually, to be honest, part of me just wanted to brace myself for more pain. So I guess there was one expectation . . . that of getting hurt again!

However, deep down in my spirit I can sense something . . . something good! Before I touch on that however I need to lay open my heart. On New Year's Eve I found myself going to our fellowship to meet with the church to see in 2011. I was caught totally off guard and the pain was awful. So I reacted . . . badly! Normally I would stay at home with the children watching the fireworks but I felt the Lord was prompting me to go and join with the church. And I knew why. It has to do with relationships. I was very clearly led back to the fellowship I'm in now for the reason of reconciliation, building and nurturing relationships with my brothers and sisters. This I did but ended up getting really hurt again. I was caught totally off guard and the pain was awful. So I reacted . . . badly! After time with God in prayer I was able to forgive and move on, the relationship quickly restored. After that however I became more withdrawn. By the end of 2010 the main purpose for going back to my fellowship came to a halt. I sensed it was important to be with the church where God has placed me to see in the new year. Funny thing was only the people I had yet to form a relationship with were there. That night I took the initiative to start the conversations, something I'm not great at as I'm actually pretty shy with new people. As a result new relationships were formed.

Back to this feeling in my spirit I mentioned earlier. Many have been anticipating great things for the new year. Many always do. But I hadn't been feeling all that positive about things lately. The past couple of months have been petty idle ones. Idle in the sense that I haven't really been pressing on but plodding on. I have grown weary in well doing. I always thought that verse meant in doing good deeds but I now understand it to mean in doing what is right in every sphere of life. In this case it's keeping the peace, maintaining and nurturing friendships while getting hurt in the process. The Amplified translates this verse well:

”And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.”Galatians 6:9

Also, other factors which have contributed to my weariness have been this harsh winter here in the UK and sickness. These have all brought me to a slower pace spiritually. Yet deep down I have sensed those people were right expecting great things for they were pressing on!

In summer last year God laid on my heart very strongly Hosea 10:12, ”Sow to yourselves in righteousness, reap in mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time to seek the LORD, till he come and rain righteousness upon you.” I knew what the verse meant but at the time nothing really ever came of it, though I did for a while ponder on it. Then this past Sunday our pastor preached on that verse. Suddenly it quickened me! Arthur Wallis commenting on the fallow ground writes:

”What is fallow ground? It is not desert that has never been cultivated. The application therefore is not to unbelievers who have never experienced God's grace. Nor is it necessarily land that was once cultivated, but has now been abandoned and returned to a desert state. So it is not a particularly the backslider who is in view. It is land that has borne fruit in the past, but now lies idle through lack of cultivation.”

That's it! If I carried on the way I was, just plodding along, there was the danger of the ground in the garden of my soul eventually becoming fallow! And what happens with fallow ground? It becomes hard AND weed-bound! Of this Wallis writes:

”One of the main objects of cultivation is to eliminate weeds that would overrun the good seed or the growing plants. 'Break up your fallow ground, and sow not among thorns,'exhorted Jeremiah (Jer.4:3). The people did not heed him, for we learn later that they reaped the thorns that they had refused to weed out (Jer. 12:13). As every gardener knows, weeds do not have to be cultivated to thrive. They are the inevitable product of neglect.”

The exhortation to break up your fallow ground has become a clarion call for me! A warning of what could happen if I just kept plodding on instead of pressing on!
So how are we to break up our fallow ground and keep it from becoming so? Repentance is always a good start but there must first be a self-humbling and contrition. Arthur Wallis puts it well:

”Humbling ourselves is the first step. This gets the blade of the plough into the hard soil. Then comes the contrition that turns the soil over.” When we humble ourselves we ”come out from our hiding place, expose our hearts and lives to the searchlight of God's presence, with a willingness to come to grips with reality.”

Contrition, as a state of repentance, acknowledges as true what God then reveals, then goes on to confession and repentance. Forgiveness and cleansing is sure to follow.

So this is me exposing my heart. Revealed by the light of God's Word I now “I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus,” for “it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.”

As I meditated on all of what the Lord was showing me, all the exhortations presented before me I suddenly realized something. Something quite wonderful which would bring me full circle back to the feeling I have deep in my spirit of good things. Attached to each of these exhortations are the most wonderful promises! Let us finish today's post by taking a look at some of them:

The exhortation in Hosea 10:12 "Sow to yourselves in righteousness, reap in mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time to seek the LORD..."
The Promise; "...till he come and rain righteousness upon you."

The exhortation in James 4:10 to "Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord..." comes with the following promise, "...and he shall lift you up."

The exhortation in Galatians 6:9 to "let us not be weary in well doing." is followed by the promise that "in due season we shall reap, if we faint not."

And the well know passage in 2 Chronicles 7:14 comes with the following exhortation; "If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways;" and is followed by the promise "then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land."

The last verse is always found when talking about revival. But if we are to see revival in our land we must first experience a personal reviving. We can then go on to pursue revival for our nation. Can you identify with anything spoken of in this post? If so may you go on to humble yourselves, and pray, and seek God's face! Break up your fallow ground, do some gardening and look for the fruit which is sure to come!

Arthur Wallis quotes are from his classic writings on revival Rain From Heaven.

Over the years and most recently, God has allowed people in my life to mirror back to me the harshness I've dished out. When this happens, I am relieved at how suddenly I'm ready to DROP all pending cases of ongoing offense I argue in His court. I walk away from those encounters thinking, "Okay, this is what they were meaning about grace. Lord, is this how I made so and so feel?"

Tonight, I came heart to heart with a wounded heart. One that looked and felt like mine not long ago. My heart is still hard, dark, and wounded, by the way, but these days I'm way more inclined to weep profusely in prayer (Praise God) about its poor condition than rationalize and defend it.

Consider this malady called pride and a few of its choice manifestations. Not long ago, when I would be offended and had opportunity to vent my offenses, I proved harsh and ungracious--like the guy who was forgiven his million dollar debt only to choke the servant who owed him ten dollars. My ungracious spirit, wanting my offenders to pay, was cloaked in mild diplomatic rhetoric but inwardly I was a lion ready to bite off heads--because I was a slave to my hurt feelings.

And even though my tone of voice was relatively mild; the things I chose to focus on revealed my tone of heart was adversarial, weak, and self-righteous. The ladder reared its head in my compulsory need, in my arguing my case, to compare myself to others who offended me. That is pointing out how "unreal" and insincere they were juxtapose to how fearlessly honest and sincere I was. I took pride in my ability to "be honest."

In my mind, as long as I was keeping it real and being honest, I was justified in my all conclusions about the matter. Keeping it real and being honest is of the essence and utmost importance, of course, but the tone underneath my honesty was bitter and censorious. One didn't have to be too discerning to pick up on it.

It was obvious in the records of wrongs I kept. I was the sacrificed victim, of course. I gave and gave sacrificially of myself to no like exchange. Plus, I was 100% accurate in my version of the story. Conveniently forgetting the proverb that says it is foolish to come out blazing in your position without the HUMILITY to hear the other party's version. In other words, it is perfectly okay to say,

Hey when you did this, it made me feel like that--while being HUMBLE enough to be open to the slightest possibility that your feeling this way may just be about the condition of your heart and not an intentional offense. For many things can be done to hurt someone's feelings--UNINTENTIONALLY.

That said, often times feelings prove to be absolutely correct. But how different would the conversation go, if in saying how you honestly felt about something, you are not ascribing evil to the person at the same time? What if your heart was tender instead of hard when you communicated how you've been hurt? How well would it go over, if we kept in mind that we all stumble in many ways and are imperfect? How well would it go over if we could just accept "I'm sorry", turn the page, and begin new?

The foremost reason this is a dose of my own medicine is that recently I've had a very hard time forgiving someone who hurt me. When they said they were sorry, it wasn't good enough. I didn't believe them. And honestly, I still don't as there is hardcore evidence to suggest that I was accurate in concluding that they were NOT really sorry for or about me, but sorry over how embarrassing the matter made them feel and look in front of their valued peers. They were sorry for wasting more of their time.

Now that is okay with me--I saw and accepted what was and forgave as Christ gave me desire and power--genuinely wishing this person well. I even think I've grown in forgiveness to a point that I could be in the person's presence and enjoy them with no NEED or desire to recall the matter. I already pray affectionately for them. But at the time, I felt the nature of the situation demanded more--and so did my pride. I gave up so much; I trusted their word and they let me down big time. My anger and hurt were justified by all the spectators watching the situation. In other words, it was not just me or just in my mind. There was a cloud of witnesses, if you will, and a trail of similar fall out to confirm.

But when they said sorry, I judged their motive to be insincere, perfunctory, self-righteous and self serving--just like my friend did with me tonight. Even if we talked, my bitter heart would have poisoned them to death with a cocktail of my record of wrongs brewed from my hurt and misery.

With strong doses of self-righteousness and bitterness like I received tonight, the proverb that says everyone seems right in his own eyes until another comes and examines him--puts me in my place and sets a guard about my mouth. It makes me think twice about how I frame my concerns--even legitimate ones. How humiliated I've been when I had to concede that my version and perception of events were skewed by a hard, unclean heart--full of bitterness, envy, and self-righteousness!

While talking with this person tonight, I was horrified as I replayed the exact same critical stance I took with others (when I felt offended by them). How trapped, in my conclusions, I must have made them feel. I was trapped tonight. I felt defeated; like I could not win. I totally understood how they could have felt the way they did, but they were holding me to a standard that I didn't even know I was being expected to meet. But more than that, my friend was wrong in the conclusions they drew. Their conclusions about my actions were exaggerated based on partial information at best. It left them the victim of my implied selfishness as they didn't seem to concede how some of the legit conclusions they drew about my behavior were warranted by their critical "attitude." It felt very "tit for tat."

I was way more relaxed in the relationship and they were keeping score. I realized tonight that, like me at one point, I had been sized up and measured and didn't pass their constant tests of friendship. Instead of humbly telling me what they needed from me as a friend, they held it against me when I didn't deliver to their expectation. Not fair or fun and a way to set yourself up to be a very lonely person.

The scary thing about all this is such a hard approach to friendship is often rooted in unresolved hurts that morph into pride and self-righteousness because these feelings have no other outlet. There is no concept of forgiving and moving on--just because I CHOOSE to love and accept you when you are unacceptable. Or just because life is short--and in the grand scheme of things, this is trivial and not worth losing a solid friendship over. Because these type A personalities, of which I am a kind, follow all the rules, they do everything right the first time; therefore, they expect others to do the same. They are intolerant or impatient with those who do not follow the rules. Three strikes and you are out. They cut you off easily and quickly. They rarely look back and if they do, there will not be any movements of any kind toward reconciliation on their part. They are great responders but poor initiators. They are the elder brother in the story of the prodigal.

Legitimately wrong, yes, some of my offenders were, but I had to realize that we are all humans capable of horrible mistakes.

Therefore, I had to ask a hard question of myself and make a choice. First, am I not human, too, capable of the same errors? Second, the choice: Forgive or not to forgive? That was the question and bottom line if I wanted freedom. I had to do the hard work of struggling in prayer in order to get God's perspective on the situation or continue isolating myself and becoming a critic of all things good--like friendships. For make no mistake about it--these kind of personalities are UNHAPPY ISOLATED PEOPLE.

Another contemplation is I have to wonder if a large part of my being single has to do with the roar I left off when some unsuspecting person stepped on one of my landmines of insecurity or pride. For I actually remember someone responding to me the exact same way I responded to my friend's hardness toward me tonight.

You know when I brought up some past minor detail that the offender forgot, thought was resolved, or thought nothing of, I was "hurt" over it and ascribed an evil motive to it and used it as "Exhibit A" to justify why I'm right for feeling like I felt. Like them, I was horrified and perplexed. Again, I see why the Lord says we must be quick to forgive. It causes problems.

My lessons learned tonight are not new--just reinforced.

1. As much as it depends upon you--let there be peace.
2. Some relationships are for a season.
3. Some people are not at the same level of abandon to Christ which is often the chief reason for relational breakdowns.
4. Trust God with the lives of His own people and keep in step with Him.
5. Don't be afraid to lose and let go.
6. Learn how to hold my relationships--not to tight, not too loose.
7. Be thankful for a light heart and one quick to turn the page--even if the other party refuses to turn it with me.
8. It only takes one to forgive. It takes two to reconcile.
9. Let God add to or subtract from my life.
10. Let God choose my friends and He shall strengthen the ones that remain!

Britain this year has seen some of it's coldest weather. Yet with this Arctic blast has been a country transformed into a winter wonderland just in time for Christmas! I thought it would be nice to share some photos I took of where I live to share with readers. Enjoy!









For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:
So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. Isaiah 55:10-11

"I will greatly rejoice in the LORD, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels." Isa. 61:10

For some time now I have had on my heart many things I wanted to share and write about. I feel sorry for Jen, founder of this blog because I keep telling her of the things which I would love to write about but then something else happens and it’s put on hold! As I press on to know the Lord more my hunger for His Word increases and I could quite happily spend a whole day in His presence. But then life happens and when your routine is interrupted you learn to appreciate those quite times with Him.

...we need Gods grace for the good days and the bad days.Interrupted routine has made me so much more grateful for His grace and my salvation. I mean I began to beat myself up a little for not being able to have the same quality time with the Lord but then I saw the trap I was falling into… AGAIN! Works based righteousness. It’s like what Jerry Bridges says, we need Gods grace for the good days and the bad days. We think that on those bad days we don’t deserve His blessing when in reality we never had any righteousness of our own to please God. It is all because of our Lord Jesus Christ we are blessed, saved and sanctified and it is His righteousness not our own, therefore we are in need of Gods grace everyday, both the good days and bad. I thank God for His loving kindness and Grace.

Our walk with the Lord is as individual as a fingerprint. We all experience different things at different times and are at different stages of our growth in Christ. To my dismay and ignorance I found that because some people weren’t at the same level as I was I became judgemental. I didn’t know I was doing it but I was. A very pivotal point in my life was the moment God opened my eyes to that carnal side which would try to become holy by my own efforts. Since that day there have been so many changes. It was a real eye opener!!! I understand more what it is to abide in Christ and I have come to know Him more intimately. I truly thank God for that.

Since knowing God more intimately, having my eyes opened to the self life and our need for God’s grace, there has been a stronger desire to share this experience with others. I don’t want to be an armchair blog critic but to go out and make Christ known and blog about it, lol. Can we love when we have more of a relationship with a point of view than with the Lord Himself?
But in the blogging world I have found there to be so many critics. They know their theology inside out. They blog about it, arrange debates to debate about it, create forums exclusively for it, fellowship only with believers who hold to it, defend it wherever it is threatened with an opposing point of view and they fall out with their brothers and sisters over it. But when it comes to living it out they fall far short. They argue “We must defend truth!” But what is truth? Truth isn’t an it, Truth is a Person!

“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” John14:6

There is such a danger of putting our theology before God. Knowing our theology more intimately than the Lord and believing it is that theological interpretation that is the way, the truth and the life…the only way to the Father. But it is not the way. Jesus is the way! Can we love when we have more of a relationship with a point of view than with the Lord Himself? For many years as a babe in Christ I was so hungry to learn that I substituted relationship for knowledge. I remember many years ago now when reading books on the Lord thinking “Why don’t I feel that way about the Lord!”. They wrote like they knew Him so personally. Deep down I knew I didn’t know the Lord like I should. But God knows and brought me through many things to establish that relationship and grow to know Him intimately.

When it comes to a theological interpretation (Non essential I hasten to add yet that should be obvious!) why do we elevate Christian teachers to the point that we name drop them to show what we are writing is sound because so and so holds to it.....but isn’t there a very subtle tendency to elevate our own ego and pride? You bet!

The other day I followed a link to a blog and to my surprise, under the title there was a subtitle which went something like this “A view held by….. , …… & ….. . There were a couple of well known teachers and one not so well known. What did they mean by that? Are they saying that because these people hold this view it must be right? Then there is nowadays an increasing elevation on ones own name over the Lords. Today there is such a danger of elevating ones ministry and name online. Of course we desperately need to spread the gospel and the truth but isn’t there a very subtle tendency to elevate our own ego and pride? You bet! I have seen many out there who take pride in their own name to become the next Paul Washer. We must turn our eyes on ourselves now and then and question our motives!
What is the aim of our blog, website or for promoting our sermons and ministries online? Is it to spread the gospel and to make disciples or is it tainted with vain glory and self exaltation?

All these thoughts have been on my heart of late and I would be interested in your thoughts too. I’m sure …. No in fact I know there are many walking wounded because of pride and stubbornness in the online Christian community but we need to overcome them, forgive and pray for those who hurt us and live out the gospel as much online as we do out there in the world. May we shine as bright lights making Christ known everywhere!

In September 2008 I published an article which rejected the idea that Christian women need to downplay their looks in order to be holy. The following response was written by one of our male readers (who prefers to remain anonymous). His thoughts are being published with his permission.

Earlier this year, in mid February, I visited a friend’s blog site, Reformed SHEology, and in my browsing through some of the titles from the past therein, happened upon one posting from September 2008 that particularly captured my notice, on the topic of physical beauty in women, and/or lack thereof (“She's . . . but she sure can cook!”). The piece had a lot of humor in it, and I had a few or more good laughs as I read, but really the subject matter was not meant to be, essentially, lighthearted or frivolous in nature at all.

Approximately twenty-five years ago I was reading through Arnold Dallimore’s two-volume Life of George Whitefield. Something I read way back then, from the chapter in Volume II concerning Whitefield’s marriage to a woman named Elizabeth James, arrested my attention in a strange sort of way, and I have never forgotten it. Whitefield, just 26 at the time, was writing a letter to a friend, announcing that he had married, and this is how he described his new bride:

“I married … one who was a widow, of about thirty-six years of age … neither rich in fortune nor beautiful as to her person, but, I believe, a true child of God …” (my emphasis added)

Hmm . . . “nor beautiful as to her person.” Clearly Whitefield was referring to external, not internal, beauty. However, the less than glowing picture of marriage for this great and now famous man of God did not end simply with this emphasis upon the external. Dallimore went on to say, more or less as a summary statement,

" . . . on this basis Whitefield’s marriage proceeded. He proved a concerned and gracious husband and she a dutiful and helpful wife, and though there was probably no strong love on either side, their attitude toward one another was at least one of devotion and mild affection.”

At the risk of sounding a bit on the cynical side, I am not too sure, if the truth were known, that such a description does not fairly well describe a lot of marriages, even successful ones that last, even Christian ones, and even, I dare say, ones in which the physical attraction/ attractiveness IS strongly present, especially in the wife (because men are naturally more enamored by this than women, I have always heard, whereas women are far more interested in a man who will simply, really, love them).

Nearly four months ago, I was finishing up reading and studying through the book of Job. A verse there in the 42nd chapter particularly grabbed my attention, after all the unfathomable sufferings Job had endured:

“And in all the land were no women found so fair as the daughters of Job: and their father gave them inheritance among their brethren.” (v. 15)

As I sometimes do, I reached for the commentary of that dear man of God from seventeenth-century England, Matthew Henry, to see what he had to say about these exceedingly “fair” daughters of Job, with the former ones, and their brothers, having all died in the tragedy told of in Job Chapter 1. I can’t speak for anyone else who would read the same, but his words struck me as very moving, very profound (quoting from the online, unabridged commentary):

“Concerning these daughters we are here told, That God adorned them with great beauty, no women so fair as the daughters of Job, v. 15. In the Old Testament we often find women praised for their beauty, as Sarah, Rebekah, and many others; but we never find any women in the New Testament whose beauty is in the least taken notice of, no, not the virgin Mary herself, because the beauty of holiness is that which is brought to a much clearer light by the gospel.”

In the glorious providence and ways of God, it has often amazed me how something so profound, and even so obvious, as this can be veiled from one’s eyes, until such a time that God sees fit to unveil them. Truly, it had never occurred to me before, that the New Testament is so loudly, so curiously silent about this very matter that is indeed given such prominence, at least in places, in the Old Testament: Eve, Queens Vashti and Esther, Abigail, Delilah, Bathsheba, etc. I ended up having a very engaging time discussing the same — Mr. Henry’s commentary on Job’s daughters — that same night at home with our own many “beautiful daughters,” and my wife, in our family devotion.

Well, it is time to get real personal and honest with this, as much so as in anything I have ever written, I do believe. And this is what everything heretofore has been leading up to. While I would never claim to be, or try or pretend to be, a modern-day George Whitefield, I, like he, married a woman not particularly “beautiful as to her person.” Without at all wanting to go into a lot of my history as a young man, more than a few decades ago by now, I would simply sum up those later teenage years by saying that I was terribly bashful with regards to the opposite sex, most especially with the “gorgeous” girls that I surely took notice of. I was pretty well convinced that none such would ever want to go out on a date or any such with me, and so, I never asked. I just “worshiped” from afar (more about this in a few minutes). As I think back on those years - with no regrets whatsoever today, mind you — it was just inevitable, I believe, that when I did eventually marry (at age 27), it would be to a woman who was not, outwardly, particularly beautiful.

All of what I just said may strike some readers as just a bit sad, or bothersome perhaps, I don’t know. I mean, there may be some who believe — naively, from my perspective — that it is almost or even downright sinful not to think that one’s own wife, no matter what she looks like, is the most beautiful woman on earth! All that aside, the infinitely greater reality that was, and still is, going on in all of this, in the unerring providence of God for my life, is not at all sad, I am quite sure. For one thing, God has blessed me and my wife with a good, strong marriage for over 27 years now. We have been through a lot, an awful lot, together. Most specifically, I have been through two exceedingly deep spiritual valleys (dungeons, is more like it) during these years, about eight years apart, and totaling about 4 full years altogether (no adultery, no porn, just immense, spiritual trials in nature). And, although there is no way of ever knowing for certain, of course, I am fairly well convinced that an outwardly beautiful, but likely far less devoted wife, would have never endured all of that, but would’ve said “adios” in the midst of the ordeal, long ago. (Please don’t misunderstand me: I’m not of course suggesting that all very attractive women are “empty beauties,” but probably a disproportionate number of them are, especially the ones who spend - needlessly spend - more time in front of their mirrors than just about anyplace else.)

Well, as I was saying concerning “adios” in the preceding paragraph, not so with my wife. True to her wedding vows to me, she stood faithfully by my side through it all. Furthermore, knowing myself as I do, I am fairly well convinced that had I married a “glamour girl” sort of woman, I would have been mighty proud of her, and would have ended up virtually worshiping her, and this, I have come to believe in later, more mature years, is at the same time diabolical, pathetic, and destined for utter futility and disappointment: “worship[ping] … the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen” (Romans 1:25). I could never state it any more powerfully, or more poignantly, than in the next-to-last verse of Proverbs chapter 31:

“Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.” (NKJV)

I could never end this confession, or call it what you will, without a bit of final commentary on what marriage is intended to symbolize: spiritual union between Christ, the truly and unfathomably glorious Bridegroom, and the Church, the Bride—made up of all true believers, from all over this planet—which, I am quite convinced, will in the end prove no “ugly bride” for such a Bridegroom. “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God” (Matthew 5:8, my emphasis). Can you even begin to imagine, dear reader, what such a sight will be like, and how that, were it somehow possible to place the most stunning, jaw-dropping “Miss Universe” in history alongside our Heavenly Father and our glorified and resurrected Savior/Redeemer/Bridegroom, she would be, at the very best, a grotesque, fearful, monstrous hag, by comparison? In fact, I believe that analogy would fit, as well, for everyone who will worship and, as part of the Bride, be married to this Bridegroom someday, robed and bejeweled in a glorified body, most certainly to include any dear sisters in Christ who, here in this life, were not, or are not, endowed by their Fashioner, God, with a whole lot in the way of external beauty, and all for His greater purposes for them.

As I draw this to a close, a line from an old hymn, rarely sung any more it seems (“When We All Get to Heaven”), comes to mind: "Just one glimpse of Him in glory, will the toils of life repay.”

I am thankful indeed for a good, faithful woman, a wonderful mother to our many children, and for God’s preserving mercies through all the long years of our union thus far. I would be lying, very honestly, if I were to say that I take no notice of all of the beautiful, and mostly youthful, female faces “out there,” and occasionally even wonder a bit what life would have been like, had I ended up with such a one, instead. I can only restate, as I have already tried to do, that the spiritual reality is the greater, eternal reality. The Creator of the human form, and the human face — particularly all of these lovely daughters of Eve, men — and everything else our eyes behold in this vast and beauteous and mysterious universe, is, we really must realize, infinitely more beautiful than anything these eyeballs can behold, and even these minds can conceive of, or take in. Yes, Moses, in the only psalm attributed to him, said it very well, speaking of this greater beauty:

“And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us” (Psalm 90, first part of verse 17).

This past Saturday I was the victim of a pickpocketing team. I am very, very aware of my surroundings, but I was duped by a distraction maneuver. One young man asked me a completely absurd question while the other took my wallet right out of my bag. I noticed my wallet missing a mere 15 minutes later. It took me about another 45 minutes to get home, go online, check my accounts and freeze them -- but in that 60-minute window, the thieves managed to charge $1500 to my accounts.

My parents have always told me "never underestimate anybody." I don't think these crooks are interested in stealing my identity. They probably were only after my money, but I took extra precautions to flag my driver's license. I don't want to underestimate these guys. But you know what? That saying works both ways. Never underestimate anybody. That means, these guys shouldn't have underestimated me, either. And I am confident they did.

You see, when these men stole from me, they underestimated me, but they also underestimated my God.Because I am a complete stranger to them, I'm confident they underestimated my impressive memory skills. They also underestimated my heightened sensitivity for even the most subtle, yet abnormal behavior. They are probably counting on me not knowing how my wallet disappeared, but unfortunately for them I know exactly where and when I was pickpocketed. I have already given the police a thorough description of the thieves. I even gave the manager of the supermarket the exact time to view his surveillance tapes, and sure enough, the whole crime was recorded. I don't know if they will be caught right away, but I have a pretty good feeling that these guys will be caught. You see, when these men stole from me, they underestimated me, but they also underestimated my God.

In December 2009, my car was stolen right out of my own driveway while I slept. The thieves only used it for joyriding, but God used it for His purposes. Out of every car on the block, the thieves chose my car -- the car that had over 5,000 gospel tracts and half a dozen Bibles in the back seat. The car was discovered by the police, abandoned at a neighborhood intersection. When I was brought in to inspect it for damages, I noticed one of the Gospels of John had been removed from the pile, and bent in half, as though it was being made to fit in someone's pocket. Never underestimate God.

Looking back on that situation, I see that God's hand was also in this pickpocketing incident. Three years ago, I gave myself a scare when I lost my wallet. Once I finally found it, I decided to put a few tracts in it so that if it ever was stolen, the thieves would get the gospel. So out of all the customers in that grocery store, I was selected to be a victim. Did these men really select me? Or was it divine providence that the one wallet they chose to steal was stuffed with gospel tracts? Could it only be coincidence that the chosen victim in this situation has been blessed with an uncanny ability to recall details, numbers, and events with impressive accuracy? What are the chances that this same victim is ready to prosecute and visit her trespassers in prison, armed with a Bible?

These two men (and a female accomplice, as I recently learned) may be wanted by the police, but at least one of them is wanted by God. God Almighty always actively pursues His elect. If it takes prison time to capture His sheep, so be it. The Word of God does not return void (Isaiah 55:11) and so this can only end up in one of two ways: these people repent, and God is glorified, or they reject the gospel, and God is glorified. End of story.

We don't want to underestimate anybody. The heart is wicked and there are hundreds of criminals walking the streets every day waiting to prey upon a trusting soul for the very purpose of exploiting her kindness in order to snatch her purse or wallet. However, those same criminals should never, ever, ever underestimate their victims. You just never know what kind of crazy, fanatical, lunatic Christians are running around, seeking to snatch your soul from the fire.

Twice a month, my church goes street evangelizing on a Friday night. This past Friday, I got into an interesting conversation with a 13-year-old girl named Amanda. Amanda told me, "I don't believe God does miracles. I believe you make your own miracles happen." I challenged her on this. I asked her if she could change a person's heart, or if she could cure someone's cancer. She agreed that she couldn't, but added that her lack of ability didn't automatically point to God's ability. "I've never seen a miracle that I couldn't explain somehow through other means. I would have to see one to believe it. And so I just don't believe that God does miracles." At this point, I replied, "Well that's something you and I have in common, Amanda. Because I don't believe God does miracles either!"

Amanda seemed shocked that I would say that. After all, if I am going to approach her on a Friday night and tell her and her friends about God, why would I want to proclaim a God who doesn't do miracles? "Well it's very simple, Amanda," I explained. "God has already shown me many times that He does miracles. I just don't believe it."

It's true. I am no different than Amanda. I have been a Christian now for 17 years, yet I still don't believe. Like Amanda, I say, "I'll believe it when I see it." But even now in my life, I am seeing miracles happen before my very eyes, and I just don't believe that God is at work. For example, I have been praying for 17 years that my Dad would get saved. About two months ago, my father developed an avid interest in the Bible (where there was none before). He has been asking me for so many resources, I cannot keep up with him. The other day, I found my father in his bedroom, listening to R.C. Sproul sermons!

There is no other explanation for this, other than the fact that God is doing a miracle in my father's heart. But do I see it that way? No. The thought crosses my mind of course, that maybe God is actually drawing my father. And then I brush it off and think, "Nahhh. He's just bored and has nothing else to do but check out the Bible," or, "There are plenty of people who have a philosophical interest in the Bible, and my dad is probably just one of them. But that doesn't make them Christians." On occasion, I have even gone as far as to think that this interest in the Bible is as far as it will go, and that my dad will never actually be born again.

I was able to explain to Amanda that the real reason she does not believe in God's miracles is because it is our human nature to not believe. Amanda doesn't believe that God can grow an amputee's legs or raise a dead person to life. I don't believe that God can save my parents, send me a husband, heal my sicknesses, or fix my finances. So what makes me so different from Amanda?

I told Amanda the story about the rich man and Lazarus in Luke 16. Remember what happened when the rich man asked Abraham to send Moses and the prophets to his relatives, so that they would believe?

[27] And he said, ‘Then I beg you, father, to send him to my father's house— [28] for I have five brothers—so that he may warn them, lest they also come into this place of torment.’ [29] But Abraham said, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them hear them.’ [30] And he said, ‘No, father Abraham, but if someone goes to them from the dead, they will repent.’ [31] He said to him, ‘If they do not hear Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be convinced if someone should rise from the dead.’” (Luke 16:26-31 ESV)

"Amanda," I said. "I am like you. I arrogantly say, I will believe it when I see it. Well I am seeing it every day! My dad is growing in his knowledge of the Bible, but even though I am seeing it, everyday, with my own two eyes, I still have unbelief." Belief is an evidence of grace in our lives. The fact that we believe on Christ for our salvation is an act of grace on God's part. Does that end once we become Christians? Of course not. God continues to give us the grace we need to trust Him at His word. Naturally, this does not mean that we should believe that God will give us everything for which we ask, but we can believe that He still does miracles!

Is there something you are not trusting God for? If so, the reason is simple: you're just like me and Amanda. If God raised Jesus from the dead, and then chose for you to become one of His daughters, why can't you believe that He will also give you a child, save your husband, mend your relationship with your in-laws, or provide for your basic needs? Could it be that you don't believe in miracles either?

Every now and then, I come across some blog posts about how irritated some people are with their church. They've absolutely had it with the pastor, the congregation, the new color that was chosen to paint the walls, whatever. The issue has really got them all hot and bothered, and they tell everyone on the World Wide Web how heinous and awful their church is (taking special care to play the victim so that their gossip will be justified). Then they pose this question to their readers: Should I leave this church and go somewhere else? If you are one of those who is wondering whether or not to leave your church, allow me to share a very personal story, which I hope will put your "crisis" into perspective.

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When I was 18 years old, a girl from college shared the gospel with me, and I was born again on the spot. But my new Christian friends told me I needed to be baptized in order to be truly saved. All I needed to do, according to them, was get baptized. Sounds simple enough, right? There was just one problem. I didn't believe for a second that baptism saved me. I considered that to be a work, and the Scriptures tell us that no man is justified by works. Naturally, this caused a great deal of friction in my relationship with my new pals in Christ.

For two months, my new church friends harassed me day and night. They waited outside the steps of my dorm, so I couldn't get in or out without bumping into them. They followed me down the streets, to the point where I had to have campus security escort me to all my classes. Once, when I was window shopping, a loyal disciple of Christ accosted me by getting within inches of my face to tell me I was going to hell. (The only way I could shake him that day was to cause a public disturbance large enough to get mall security to come to my aid.) I was unable to change my phone number, so I had to turn off the ringer. They left horrible messages on my answering machine every day, telling me that I was going to burn in hell because they were the only church on the planet that knew the truth. They also followed me to my job, causing my boss to hide me in a free-standing closet when they demanded to know my whereabouts.

They gave me one last chance to forsake my wicked, sinful belief that baptism is not a requirement for salvation. I refused. And so, they held me against my will for several hours in that apartment.One day they called a truce, and asked me to meet them for lunch. I still remember the address of the four-story apartment where I was served a tuna melt sandwich and greeted with all sorts of awkward, yet obviously rehearsed pleasantries. They gave me one last chance to forsake my wicked, sinful belief that baptism is not a requirement for salvation. I refused. And so, they held me against my will for several hours in that apartment. This was before cell phones, and I couldn't get to a landline. There was only one of me, and about five of them. They locked the doors and told me that the only way they would release me was if I chanted "I am not a Christian, I am not saved, I am going to hell." At first I didn't comply. But after about an hour, I realized that there was no other way out of there. And so I chanted "I am not a Christian, I am not saved, I am going to hell" probably about three or four dozen times before they released me with one last warning that by walking out that door, I was walking out on God Almighty Himself. I don't know how many hours I was there. All I remember is, it was lunchtime when I arrived, and it was dark when I left.
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So that was my introduction to the body of Christ. I don't tell that story very often, but I feel inspired to share it all these years later. I remember feeling absolutely spiritually destitute during that time. Growing up, I was constantly under the weight of existential meaninglessness, hoping that by some miracle there was a purpose to this life, and when I am finally introduced to the most beautiful Person my mind and soul could ever imagine, I am told by His "followers" that I couldn't have any part of Him. It took me months to get my facts straight and rest on the promises of God. I'll admit, there was little comfort in the fact that God allowed that to happen to me in the first place. But some people told me that one day, my story might edify someone. Well perhaps that day is today.

Perhaps you are someone that is in this type of predicament. Let me assure you, God is faithful. He will never abandon or forsake you. You will come out of spiritually abusive situations a bit bruised, but intact. And He promises to make you whole.

But for most of us, situations like this are not the norm. Most of us are just irritated that our leaders are not running things to our liking. Most of us have no idea how good we really have it in our churches. We don't know what real corruption is. We have never experienced real abuses of power. We have never been persecuted by our government. We complain because there's too much emphasis on men's ministry, or there's not enough opportunities for singles, or we don't like the way the hospitality committee is functioning, and so on. We need to remind ourselves that the church is made up of flawed, sinful people. And since we are a sinners ourselves, our presence is only adding to those problems. Instead of complaining about what your church is lacking, consider the fact that perhaps God has brought that to your attention so you can begin the work of building up that area in your local church.

Do I get fed up with my church sometimes? You bet! But I know I have it really good where I am. I know that my leaders, although we don't always see eye-to-eye, always treat me with respect. They do not hold me captive in their homes and force me to chant lies. They do not preach a false gospel. And even if they did, God is in control. His Word has survived throughout the ages. Whatever you are going through, it will pass away -- but His words will never pass away!

So where does your issue fall? On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being a petty disagreement with your church leaders, and 10 being an all-out abuse of power and defamation of the gospel, how would you honestly rate your situation? Or better yet, how would someone else rate your situation?

Today I am pleased to bring you the second installment of our new "SHEologian Spotlight" series by honoring a reader named Jean.

Now just to remind you again how this works, Jean is a total stranger to me. We have never met. The idea is to try to appreciate something about a total stranger as a way to encourage her, but also, to encourage us all (myself included) to simply appreciate the beauty in every single one of God's children. The best way I know how to do this is to view someone's blog. So much of a person's heart, soul, and identity is invested in her blog. So without further ado, here is what I can gather about Jean from her blog:

About Jean
Jean is 27 years old. She enjoys running and monitoring her health through natural means. Jean describes in her Blogger profile that before being saved, she worked as a Mental Health Nurse. Today, she is a full time wife and mother to her three children. Jean resides in Lanchashire, England. She is of Zimbabwean descent.

What Attracted Me To Her Blog
The very first time I visited Jean's blog was in 2008. Someone referred me to a few posts she had written. One thing that I noticed about some (not all) of Jean's posts were that they were very controversial. I did not agree with everything I read, but I admired her courage in posting her thoughts amidst a great deal of backlash. This is something I think we can all learn from Jean, especially when it comes to evangelism. There are many times when we as Christians are faced with tough questions and we are afraid that if we give the truthful answers, people might be angry with us. I cannot say what goes through Jean's head when she reads some of the critical comments she's received from people in the past, but regardless, she's standing up for what she believes in. That's a skill we all need to develop!

Why I am Grateful for Jean
The main reason I have chosen to celebrate Jean in this installment of SHEologian Spotlight is that she has recently posted a very candid and touching confession on her blog. In her March 23 post, "An Open Apology to All," Jean pours out her heart as she admits to sins of pride and legalism. The post is truly inspiring because it illustrates how truly powerless we are in many cases to see our own sin, and how desperately we need God to do the work of change in our lives. What is really truly amazing about Jean's post is that she describes what she was like as a legalist: how she judged others for not being able to pull themselves up from their own bootstraps, only to discover that she was in the very same predicament, unable to pull herself out of bondage to legalism. Here is an excerpt from her story:

To me everyone else became lost. The road had been narrow before, but it became even narrower. Almost impossible. Before long I had come to believe that all the churches out there are apostate. I even believed there was no true Pastor alive today. All bible teachers were deceived . . .I started isolating myself from other believers, and I became a lone ranger Christian, eventually leaving the church I was attending . . . Yet I felt so empty inside. So lonely. Something was so wrong and I could not put my finger on it. I would ask God to help me over and over, yet the next day I would feel worse . . . Somehow deep down I knew these other believers had encouraged me so much. I had never realised it until I was completely cut off from other Christians. I even missed the Christians who had encouraged me on my blog. I had never felt so isolated . . . I realised my error. I realised the lies and deceits I had followed. I realised that I had been so deceived. It felt like I have been bewitched, as if someone had cast a spell on me. And suddenly the Lord pulled me out. There was something spiritually dark and unhealthy about the whole experience. I came face to face with who I really am. I realised what a terrible witness for Christ I had been. I realised how I had gone around calling everyone that did not agree with me lost. I had been so judgemental. I judged people's hearts. Yet no one judged my heart. I was a legalist. I was in error. I was wrong.

Reading this confession from Jean brings tears to my eyes every time I read it (and I have read it time and time again) because it is so encouraging to me. It is encouraging because I know legalistic people, and at times it seems as though they will never change. Jean is the inspiration that miracles in this area do happen. But even more encouraging is the reminder that GOD IS AT WORK! He never leaves us or forsakes us, even when we are marinating in our most ungodly attitudes. He remains with us through every season of our lives, and does not withdraw His faithfulness when we are faithless. And we see from Jean's story, that performing certain actions is a faithless task. James said that faith without works is dead. Likewise, works without faith is also dead. Works without faith is just works, and no man is justified by his works.

I am grateful to Jean for her courage. I think it is human nature for each of us to have so much pride that we don't even admit our shortcomings to one another. Yet this is exactly what the Great Physician would have us to do. Confession is freeing to those who are confessing, and it is a blessing to those of us who are on the receiving end of the confession.

When I first approached her about the SHEologian Spotlight, she protested, saying she did not think she was a good example to others. I thought she might say something like that. It is a pretty typical response of those who are recently humbled, because they do not want to become prideful again, but also because they are truly so grieved over their sin, they cannot possibly see themselves as an encouragement to anybody.

On April 23, C.J. Mahaney spoke as a guest at my home church, and he delivered a powerful message about God's love for us. In his message, C.J. asked, "Why do we have such a hard time believing that God loves us?" C.J. shared his personal theory: it's because we look within ourselves for any redeeming qualities, and we are disappointed, because there are no redeeming qualities that come from within! Instead, we must look to Calvary for the reasons to forgive ourselves and move on.

Jean was right on one hand. She is not a good example, at least, not if we were to measure her actions based on her own merits. But when we look at her story and take the focus off Jean and instead put it on what God has done in her life, then we can't find a more wonderful, perfect example than Jean.

If you would like to meet Jean, visit her blog:
The Virtuous Woman

Please Note: The SHEologian Spotlight series is designed to honor our readers, whomever they may be. We do not necessarily agree with everything that is posted on other people's blogs. We recognize some of these views may likewise differ from yours. Should you desire to pursue these issues further with any of the individuals featured in this series here or on their blogs, we humbly ask that you keep the discussion friendly and irenic in the spirit of brotherly love. Thank you and God Bless!

I have been very stressed out lately. So much, that last weekend I noticed spots all over my arms - little, red itchy spots. I had the chicken pox when I was a child, and I've been told you can't get them twice. My mother is not a doctor, but she works in the medical field (and she is a mom), so I asked her to look at my spots. After examining me briefly, she said, "I don't know what it is, but if it gets any worse, see a doctor . . . and stay away from me!"

Varicella Zoster Virus (VZV), which causes chicken pox, also causes shingles. Even though my mother had chicken pox as a child, she once experienced a very severe case of shingles as an adult. Knowing her immune system was weak in the face of VZV, she avoided me as much as possible. My father, on the other hand, has an incredibly strong immune system. While my mother ran for cover every time I entered the room, my father sat, undisturbed. The possibility that I might be infected with VZV did not cause him any worry whatsoever. Reflecting upon this situation, I am reminded of a passage from the Book of Romans:

Receive one who is weak in the faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things. For one believes he may eat all things, but he who is weak eats only vegetables. Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats; for God has received him. Who are you to judge another’s servant? To his own master he stands or falls. Indeed, he will be made to stand, for God is able to make him stand. (Romans 14:1-4, Emphasis mine.)

How does this relate to my unidentified illness? I'll give you an illustration. Let's suppose that every time I walked into a room, my mother wore a surgical mask and sprayed disinfectant on everything I touched. Then imagine my mother looking down her nose at my dad because he isn't as health-conscious as she is! Of course, this would be unreasonable of my mother, because my father has no reason to care about being exposed to my germs. It's not because he's stupid, careless, or even attracted to the idea of getting sick. No, the reason my father doesn't care about being exposed to my germs is because he knows VZV does not pose a problem for him personally. My father can handle my germs because his immune system is strong. My mom, in spite of all her pious displays of good hygiene, would only be performing these silly rituals for one reason and one reason alone: her immune system is weak.

The chicken pox scenario in my family is a lot like the way we behave when we are being legalistic, isn't it? When we judge others, it gives us the illusion that our faith is strong. We think, "Oh look at that one wearing makeup, or cutting her hair short, or having a career, or sending her children to public school or feeding high fructose corn syrup to her family or (insert your favorite example here)!" We shake our heads in false pity and feel sorry for this "carnal" sister. After all, her faith is weak. She is easily lured by the ways of the world. You and I, on the other hand, choose to stay far, far away from those things. This is because we have the strength to resist them, right? Wrong.

Look carefully at that passage again. Who in the passage is described as being weak? Is it the one who eats meat sacrificed to idols? On the contrary, the one who is weak is the one who abstains. I'll give you a personal example. Geraldine is on Facebook, and I am not. There have been times in the past when I have openly denounced Facebook with such a passion that I have caused Geraldine (and others, I'm sure) to feel conflicted about it. On the surface, I appear to be the strong one. After all, I'm the one with conviction, right? Geraldine, who experiences doubt about her choices from time to time (thanks to me and my strong convictions) appears weak in her faith. But look carefully at that passage again. Who in the passage is described being as weak? Is it the one who eats meat sacrificed to idols? On the contrary, the one who is weak is the one who abstains. Why is this so? Because the one who abstains is the one who struggles with something that isn't necessarily unclean! (Romans 14:14,20).

I could argue that Geraldine is weak in her faith because she doesn't have the strength to resist Facebook. But in reality, I am weak in my faith because I don't have the strength to use Facebook without encountering a problem. Facebook to me is like the Varicella Zoster Virus. I know that if I am exposed to it, I will stumble into all kinds of sin. Geraldine is not prone to the same sins I am. She can openly be exposed to Facebook and not get sick. Therefore, Geraldine is the stronger of the two of us. And as a result, she has the freedom to enjoy all the fun that comes with having a Facebook account. I do not have this same liberty. Sure, I miss out on the fun, but I compensate for this by telling myself that I am just a lot more holy than all the people who use Facebook. (Do you see how this works? The flesh is clever, isn't it?)

Readers, do you see how deceptive legalism can be? Not only are we imposing rules upon people who do not need them, we are robbing people of the joy that God has freely given them to experience. It is wrong for us to rob others of the joy that comes with seeing a movie or singing a pop song on the radio or wearing the latest fashion, simply because it poses a problem for us personally. It would be like my mother requiring all of you to wear a surgical mask in my presence when being in my presence is not a danger to you to begin with.

At the same time, we are not to flaunt our liberty in the face of the weaker brother. Romans 14 warns the strong Christian to protect the weak one. In other words, if Geraldine were to brag about how much fun Facebook is, and how much joy I am missing out on, and check her Facebook account right in front of me, that would cause me to stumble and it would be sin on her part. But Romans 14 also acknowledges that an equal problem arises when the weak Christian looks down on the strong Christian for the very liberty God has given her to enjoy.

How many of us have deceived ourselves into thinking we were the stronger Christian? We set up unreasonable rules for people to follow, and anyone who doesn't abide by these rules we label "weak." Could this be you? I've heard it said that the number one sign that we are trapped in legalism is that our joy is gone. Consider the possibility that the years we've spent looking down on others for not homeschooling, or having a career, or wearing jewelry -- or whatever -- were not years spent in pious devotion to holy living. The time we spent pitying those "carnal" Christians trapped in bondage to worldly pursuits were actually years we spent in bondage to our own weaknesses. In a similar fashion, some of us have spent years of our lives under the thumb of these legalistic rules because they were being enforced by someone weaker, who appeared to us to be stronger. Well, appearances can be deceiving!

Remember, God has commanded us: "Let not him who eats despise him who does not eat, and let not him who does not eat judge him who eats" (Romans 14:3). In essential things, unity. In nonessential things, liberty. In all things, charity. Let's ask the Holy Spirit to reveal the viruses in our lives, so we can be free of the legalism imposed upon us by others, and in turn free others from the legalism we have imposed upon them.